News of the day

I would like to announce that I am writing a story, and I like it so far. I am not revealing it until it is complete, so I hope that you await it with anticipation, but don't wet your pants yet. It's gonna be good. I'll give you one sentence: "For some reason, 'Old Miss Mag' was a legend in town. Emmalyn had heard that her real name was Magnolia Taylor, but she hated her first name, and her last name was a constant reminder that she never married, so she didn't use either."
Ok, that's all I'm giving you for now...and it doesn't give much away, it's just to wet your appetite--I hope you're hungry. I'm hoping to finish it quickly...I was always afraid to write before because I thought I would find that I am no good at it. But I promise to attempt.

In other news, I had another meeting at Triton...I went there and talked to the principal a full FIVE minutes. It was ridiculous. He told me that he would like to have me...he's going to call my references soon and he will keep in touch and hopefully we can get this all straightened out in the next few weeks. There is still a hiring freeze, so not too much we can cut through there. But I was able to go spend time with my students and read The Odyssey...what fun! I really enjoyed being there for part of the day, and hopefully I can soon call it my home and have my own classroom there. It's where I want to be.

I'm going to start working at Food Lion again next week. Woowhee, here comes the summer. But I'm okay with that, it's a job and in my free time I can read and write and prepare for what's to come. Hopefully I can pull away some weekends for traveling to see the ones I love that are a bit far away..

Ah, those summer nights

I should be sleeping, but staying up late is what summers are for, right?

Some things I've been thinking about lately:

a. I should do better at summer reading. I think people expect me to be a huge reading nerd bc I majored in English, but I really have to buckle down and make time to read it seems. I do love it (although I still think I'm a slow-ish reader), but I'm usually a bum and do other random things instead...and a lot of my time recently has been filled with applications, organizing my room, and trying to see some friends before they go away for a long time. So it's acceptable I think. But soon, I shall re-embark on the MANY new and exciting (yet classic) book finds from yardsales that have been gathering dust on my newly set-up bookcases in my room.

b. What has happened to my heart? There are times when I am so up, and times when I am so down. There is just no in-between for me. I have always known that and seen that in my life, but I feel like recently I've been so sad inside for stupid, selfish reasons. I envy the lives of people I know, and I think that things "should have been different" for me...and it's a load of blah. I have been looking back on many things that I find in my room: trinkets, letters, yearbooks, etc. And realizing that there are times in my life that I have been so completely in love with the Lord that my heart just swells with joy and it comes out in the things that I write, say, and do. I don't know where I am exactly right now, but I know that I am not where I should be. I am crying out for Christ to be my all, but inside I am thinking "if only I had this...then everything would be okay.." But I will NEVER find myself in anything else but the One who redeemed my life from the pit of emptiness and death. So I pray that my heart will be renewed..."refresh my heart in Christ!"

c. I think any other problems I've been thinking about will always relay back to b, so I will go "this far and no further....we must draw the line here!" (if you can tell me what that's from you will get your name in my happy book)

d. I'm ready to be a teacher and have my own classroom and my own students, who will become what I secretly call my "babies" even though they're not that young. I am so excited to have my own room and decorate it and teach them.

Call to the Lord, and He will answer. This I believe.

The job search..

The days go on here in the life of Ab...

I graduated from Campbell University on May 9, 2009 with a Bachelor's Degree in English with Teacher Licensure, and a 3.921 GPA.

I moved home to HP, and now I'm hanging out with my family and some friends here for the summer. I'm looking to find a part time job until I start teaching in the Fall...and it looks like I might end up back at Food Lion, but at least I won't have to start anything new and it'll bring in some money to get me started on buying furniture/home supplies/rent for the fall...which brings me to...

I had an interview at Triton High, where I did my student teaching. I really enjoy the school--I've been very comfortable there, and I just keep coming back to knowing that it's where I want to begin teaching. I went to the Harnett Co. teacher job fair this past Monday, and it went pretty well...I enjoyed talking to the principal and assistant principals from Triton, and I got to see my cooperating teacher...love her! I also talked to a few other principals, but nothing else seemed promising...and I'm okay with that. Two days after the fair, I got an email from the Triton prinipal saying he would like for me to come back and talk to him about the open English position...I really have a hunch that he is going to hire me. I don't want to say for sure, but I'm almost certain. So, I'll be going back sometime in the next few weeks, and that'll be MISS LIND, to those freshman coming up next year! woo hoo!

I also had an interview at HPCA today, but they don't actually have a position open right now, just wanted to talk to me...so I'm gonna call it "good experience" in getting more interviews. yay.

Anyways, it's interesting beginning a new life outside of "college." I know I haven't exactly gone out on my own yet, but I think I will be doing that soon because I will have to figure out housing and costs along with good budgeting and saving methods. I really want to be a good steward of the money that I earn. I just don't want to go back and get in a rut...I'm afraid of what's to come of course...I don't want to be lonely, but I also don't want to feel like I'm still in college because most of my friends around there still are. So I'm praying for the Lord to send me a few really good close friends that I can rely on there to spend time with, and that I will be able to find roommates so that I can keep housing costs down.

So, the great news is that I might have a job soon, and the Lord is always good!

LoveLoveLove.

Abs

College minus class

College really is fun without the classes. Although I do admit to total nerdiness and love of learning, I love having time to hang out with people and truly enjoy conversation and quality time without worrying about the work I need to accomplish.

So, this week so far, I've done a lot due to the FACT that I am DONE with college:

Friday-Ben's 21st bday party with some amazing people
Saturday-Hung out in Raleigh with Kristin and Robyn (the beach trip washed away due to a rain forecast): brunch, $1.50 movie, long nap, dinner complete with amazing mashed taters, and good conversation
Sunday-Church at Grace PCA, an adventurous day with Diane at Raven rock complete with sweat, laughs, poetry, mountains, and strawberry picking! Then a huge taco dinner and a movie
Monday-AMAZING interview at Triton with the principal (not set in stone, but it looks like I have a job for the next school year!) then--fun day with Laurie turning in license paperwork and shopping in Smithfield (I met my husband haha) and eating shaved ice, then dinner with the boys and Diane--then a sleepover with Diane!
Tuesday-More adventures with Laurie at the board of ed. and Tubby's diner in Erwin, then hung out with the Crosses, and finally dinner with Kristin, Ruth, and Robyn...followed by SUNNI SKY'S!
To come:
Wednesday: Lunch at Dr. Peterman's with some lovely, intelligent senior girls, then ROAD TRIP with CeCe to go see Erin at Liberty U!
Thursday: Still at Liberty...then coming back
Friday: (planning in progress) but mostly packing up the dorm room
Saturday: GRADUATION FROM CAMPBELL UNIVERSITY: Abigail Grace Lind, BA in English Education, Summa Cum Laude!!!!! Saying goodbyes, hugs, tears, and a bonfire at the patty.
Sunday: church, then heading home for the summer to find some kind of job around HP...

Love to you.
Abs

If I hear the word economy again, I will shriek..

Current thoughts:

Dear NC legislature:

Stop cutting teacher jobs and teacher pay. If you diminish advances in education, you automatically impoverish our future.

Not much love,
Abigail

Ok, so I am not thinking this just because I need a teaching job. However, I'm tired of the fact that all I hear from principals is, "We would love to have you, but I don't know if I can hire anyone because I'm waiting to hear from the county..." I just can't help but realize that cutting education is a huge mistake in the long run. It CAN'T happen. That's all there is to it. Making classes larger and getting rid of teachers makes less time for individual learning, and neglects many students who will fall to the wayside just because they are not vocal enough to demand attention they need. It hurts my heart. Of course I'm worried that I will not get a job...for some reason, I'm pretty sure I will...maybe because I'm prideful and I know that I'm way too awesome for them to turn me down, but I'm just so frustrated.

I'm not even that excited about graduating because I'm so nervous about what's coming next. I don't know where I'm going to be next year, how I'm going to figure out where to live/who to live with/furniture to buy/etc... so I can't even enjoy what's going on right now. Plus, I am trying to find some little summer job near high point to keep me afloat until I do get a real "big girl" job in the Fall. I just never expected for things to be like this...all I heard about coming into education was the "teacher shortage, especially in High School," so it just doesn't make any sense to me.

Ok, I will stop now. I know that the Lord has a plan, it's just very hard to see myself surrounded by a cloud of confusion.

Oh, the wonder of life!

Blessed Assurance

Sometimes I make these big plans for myself...and then they all come crashing down.
Which brings me to my knees, as well.
Ouch, sometimes I hit my face.

So I found out that I did not get the RD job at Campbell for next year...and I am still uncertain as to where I will get a teaching job. Triton still looks pretty promising, but no guarantees there either. Pooie, it looks like I'm going to have to grow up a little faster than I thought I would have to. Blah I just get so selfish and frustrated inside when my awesome "plans" don't work out the way I thought they should.

I really wanted to be an RD and get to know some more young girls coming into college and have an influence and blahdee blah...but then again, I know I will be able to focus on my students 100% my first year of teaching. YET, I will have to find a place to live (and get a job), and will not be able to save as much money as I had hoped during my first few years of teaching. I just wanna save up money and go to grad school and learn about Southern Literature and perhaps get a TA position at State or something. With my 3.9 GPA, it's a possibility; but I would like to take off time from teaching to focus on that at some point too, which is hard to do without any funds to support myself.

Another thought: why is it that people who are getting married can have people "shower" them with gifts and go to Target and pick out anything in the store and people go buy it for them, but people who are single and need to start a new life would be considered completely rude and weird to have a gift registry for things they need? I don't really have the money to buy things I need like towels and kitchen supplies for an apartment, but since I'm single and not getting married anywhere in the near future, I don't get a party thrown for me? Yes, singleness in itself is a gift...but getting married has its gifty perks! Oh, the irony. Haha! (Ok ok I'm done with that outbursting ramble!)

In the end, I am reminded of the old tune "Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine..." And that is the only assurance that is completely certain and unfading. My plans fail. Always. His plans are sovereign, and I trust him. He will secure my needs. Hallelloo...if I trusted myself, I'd be in a very dark place, I'm sure..

"Everybody knows it hurts to grow up..." [Ben Folds]

Miss...uh...Lynn?

Well, student teaching is coming to a close almost! I have officially finished more than enough teaching hours (142 out of 125 to be exact), and I will still teach a few more days before the semester closes, I'm sure. Honestly, the whole deal has been a lot less stressful than I thought it would be. I only had one full breakdown day, and it was near the beginning when I had just started Romeo and Juliet and I just freaked out and stopped breathing for a little bit, cried my eyes out, and talked to people I knew would help me. They encouraged me and brought me back to where I knew I should be: knowing that I am capable and completely ready to teach.

Yes, I have complained about my situation...more so at the beginning because I was still very unsure of what I was doing and decided to put blame on situations and innocent people rather than myself, I admit. But the more comfortable I became with my students and the school, the less I worried about thinking too hard; I just DID it. I can't even explain how, it just came to me. I love teaching, there can be no denying it.

The thing I love the most about teaching is interacting with my students. They have really become my own; and I truly love each one of them. Sometimes they grate my nerves and make me call them down, but that's a necessary part of growing and learning. I know that the education system is messed up and politics are flying everywhere and there's no money in the economy for education, so we're going to send future generations down the drain (ok, so I'm being a little harsh, but it irks me). I have heard it all. But I also know that I am willing to work hard to be a great teacher. I know I can teach students who think that they can't do anything; because I know that they can. It's frustrating when they write essays like they are texting, but those are boundaries I am going to have to break.

Ok, so you're wondering about the title. I have learned every single student's name...that's about 70, okay? And my name is written clearly on the whiteboard next to the date every day. Yet these precious lambs still cannot remember my name. "Miss, I have a question...Miss..." "Miss Lynnn? Wheaare are yOu frommm?" "High Point." "Aoohhh. I knew you weren't from 'round down hearr." Precious lambs? Yes, indeed.

One of my favorite things is to start the class off by singing in opera, "The bell has rung!" It's super fun and makes them think I'm crazy. I love that.