The Teacher "Look"

It's a cold stare that means business.
It's the narrowing of the eyes and the hand on the hip.
It's the dead silence that can be cut with a knife.
It's...the teacher "look."

Well, I taught my first full day of school yesterday, and the comments from Mrs. C. were, "I have nothing to tell you to improve upon...the only thing for you to think about is time management, and it's just something you'll gain with practice." "You are a natural, there's nothing more I can say."

Wow, what a relief. So, I have appeased the master -- but, I think that's what I did -- I taught like her. So I have decided I'm slowly going to kick up my feet and start bringing in some new ideas. If I have already proven that I have the ability to teach well, then I can prove that I can teach well with a variety of activities, too. And most of all, I've proven to myself that I love doing this, no matter how hard it is at certain times. I've always heard teaching is a gift, and I've unwrapped it and tried it on; and well, it fits! And that's so exciting for me. I know I do and will complain, but I know that I still love it. Because I love those students, and I am willing to give, give, give...no matter the long hours of preparation, the drooping eyes in the classroom (because just a few "I get it!" looks are worthwhile), the incessant chattering that I hush by my witty remarks ("Just because I walked to another part of the room does not mean I've disappeared!"), or the fights in the hallways that will never cease. They need someone to give them love, because it may not come from anywhere else.

So, I'm perfecting my "I-mean-business" look that covers the look that cares more than they know. Draining, yes. Worth it, yes.

This semester is going to seem long but short all at the same time. I want to spend time with people but it's so hard to balance my "bedtime" and lesson planning with truly knowing and loving those around me. So, "time management" needs to smack me in the face in all realms of living. Why is it that sometimes you don't see something big until it seems almost too late? Am I running out of time, or do we really have all the time in the world?

Love never fails.
Abigail